Meat Salad

Meat Salad

Hi Everyone,

Do you get tired of all those vegetables pretending to be something they are not? Veggie Burgers? Tofurkey? Smoked Soyman? Well, now you can turn the table, (the kitchen table), on those damn vegetables and their hidden agendas, to kill your taste buds and erase your manliness!

Here is your very own recipe for a Meat Salad, guaranteed to put hair on your chest, muscle on your bones, and cholesterol in your heart. Not only that, but it has some of your favorite ingredients: meat, meat, meat, and guess what? More meat!

Prep Time: 20 Min
Cook Time: 30 Min
Ready In: 50 Min
Servings: 1 real man

40 slices bacon
1 ham, shredded
10 cups chopped chicken meat
42 meatballs, chopped
4 cesos, crumbled
12 sausages, diced
18 sheep balls, chopped
32 buffalo wings, precooked
1 (8 ounce) bottle Ranch-style salad dressing
1 gallon cheddar cheese

1. Start eating buffalo wings as a snack until your meat salad is ready.
2. Place all of your meat in a large skillet. Feel free to improvise with other meat lying around the house.
If your skillet isn’t big enough, maybe you’re not manly enough for this dish?
3. Cook over medium high heat, stirring repeatedly, until all of your meat is evenly brown.
4. No bowl needed. Just get a fork.
5. Drizzle with ranch and cheese.
6. Enjoy!

Take that vegetables!

Note: To feel even more manly, this could also be eaten with your hands, raw.

Side Note: If you make and eat this, you should go to the hospital right away.
But in a manly way!

3 thoughts on “Meat Salad

  1. *It’s hard to find knowledgeable people on this topic, but you sound like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks

  2. Thank you, Spammer Loynes, for commenting on my “topic”. I do have a culinary degree with a concentration in pork products. May you have a great time spamming the rest of the Internet. I believe in you! You can do it!

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