Hogwarts Illegally Recruits Top Quidditch Players

Hogwarts Illegally Recruits Top Quidditch Players

HOGWARTS, SCOTLAND – Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has been brought up on charges of bribery and corruption of minors for its recruitment efforts of top Quidditch players.

Igor Karkaroff, former Highmaster of the Durmstrang Institute, is the lead plaintiff in the case, whose school is also Hogwarts top competitor.

Karkaroff claims, “Hogwarts has been illegally recruiting students for years, offering full scholarships and magical trinkets to all the top players.  It’s unfair, unjust, and unwizardly.”

Current Headmistress, Minerva McGonagall, says the claims are “Outrageous!” and refuses to add further comment.

While no solid proof has been provided, the school’s faculty are being brought before the Ministry of Magic for questioning.

Students on campus, like Neville Longbottom, have their own opinion regarding the charges.

“They say they have to keep raising our tuition, but there’s plenty of money to buy all new Golden Snitches every week.  Why can’t they be aluminum snitches?” asks Longbottom who does not play Quidditch and has had to pay for his entire tuition during his time at Hogwarts.

While the claims against Hogwarts are still being disputed, all Quidditch matches will continue on as planned.


Snitch image by Diego.goergen (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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