What I’ve Learned from Watching Porn

What I’ve Learned from Watching Porn

  1. No matter what operation you’re about to have, you’re balls will need to be shaved.
  2. Deep emotional trauma is best resolved by having sex with your therapist.
  3. If the pizza isn’t delivered in 30 minutes or less, someone’s dick will get sucked.
  4. No one ever skis on a ski trip.
  5. Teenage girls would rather suck dick for a ride home than take the bus.
  6. Hot girls always forget to close the door when changing, showering, brushing their teeth naked.
  7. The babysitter will always do something wrong that requires a threesome as punishment.
  8. Most Al-Qaeda recruits are incredibly hot women.  Search them thoroughly at the airport.
  9. Japan’s public transit includes the Metro Gang Bang.
  10. If you need to be put under for a root canal, someone’s going to have sex with you.

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Computer by Everaldo Coelho and YellowIcon [LGPL], via Wikimedia Commons

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